Dinner with my grandparents is like having dinner with two rambling time travelers from 1900’s with southern accents. Don’t get me wrong, I love them. They’re cute and happy and adorable and funny. Part of the reason that they’re so funny is because half of the time, they don’t even know what they’re saying. They both have bad hearing, so one of them will start to talk about something and then the other one will start to talk about something completely different. Their conversations might sound like this:
Grandma: “Did you pick up the medications last night?”
Grandpa: “I tried, but they were out of lettuce.”
Grandma: “Let us do what?”
Grandpa: “Yup, she told me the same thing.”
This happened on a regular basis last night when we had dinner together. At first, I tried to explain the conversations, but that just ended up with me talking and them staring at me through squinted eyes with puzzled looks on their faces. After a while, I just gave up trying to actually have them understand what they were saying and just went along with their “conversations” (more like random sentences shouted at each other from opposite ends of the table). One time, I asked my grandpa if he enjoyed his android phone, and he looked completely horrified before responding. He responded by saying “I don’t have hemorrhoids, dear.” I took me a while to figure out what the hell he was talking about, but then I realized he just misheard me. I quickly tried to explain the misunderstanding, but I don’t think it did much good.
Before we met for dinner, I sent them an email to confirm the time that they were coming. I never got a response, so when they came for dinner, I politely asked them if they received my email. They responded by saying “Did you send the email to our upstairs computer email account, or our downstairs computer email account?”. I asked them what they meant and they told me that they have an email account that goes to their second floor (of their house) computer and another email account that goes to their first floor (of their house) computer. I told them that I never knew about this (how stupid of me for not sending it to their downstairs email!). They told me it was fine, and to just call them to see what floor they were on. I was about to tell them how illogical this sounded and that if I called them, then there would be no need for me to email them, but I just let it go. I didn’t want to confuse them anymore. It had never occurred to me to consider what floor of their house they would be on when they would receive my email.
After dinner, my grandparents pulled out a tablet and asked me if I could help them use their tablet. I said “Of course! When did you get a new tablet?”, and my grandma told me that it wasn’t new and that they have had the tablet for two years. I was kind of surprised with this answer, so I asked them if they needed help with something in particular. “Yes,” my Grandma responded, “How do you turn it on?” I explained everything to them, but in my mind I was thinking “What the hell have they been doing with this tablet for two years without knowing how to turn it on?”
The whole night was very confusing. They didn’t know what I was saying and I didn’t understand half of their conversations or logic, so all in all, it was a pretty dysfunctional night. It might have been extremely confusing, but I was with my family, and that’s what matters. We might have our off days (more like years), but it wouldn’t be the same without them. I love them. I am not saying all grandparents are like my grandparents. That is not at all what I’m saying. In fact, I know some of my friends grandparents that are quite technologically savvy. I guess my grandparents are just… special. In their own little way.
Thank you for reading! I will always try to read the blogs of the people who support me! Thank you again!